The best thing about reindeer

I recently read a book about memory loss in middle age. That’s when perfectly normal adults turn into scatter-brained old fuddy-duddies who enter a room only to realise they’ve forgotten why they went there in the first place, who have to ask three times which stop they need to go to when taking a bus and then get off at the wrong one regardless, or are constantly looking for the glasses they have perched on their forehead. The book also contained a chapter on how to prevent this: Never stop challenging your brain to learn something new and complex.

So, to prevent my brain from ever turning into mushy peas, I decided I would continue to expand my guiding experience and challenge myself to something new. This year, I am working as a tour guide for an excellently managed, small German travel operator – and took off north, to the Finnish part of Lapland, to keep my brain on its toes and make new friends.

One of the friends I’ve made here is a very cute reindeer by the name of Kumimatto. Should you wonder how this is pronounced: It’s pronounced almost exactly the same as the German word „Gummimatte“. And it means exactly the same as the German word Gummimatte: It means rubber mat. „What a strange name for a reindeer“, you might think. Well – Kumimatto was given to his owner in return for a rubber mat. One of Kumimatto’s pals is called Kimi Räikkönen, and Kimi’s best friend is called Max Verstappen. Both of them are set to be sledge reindeer when they grow up, but currently, the three are still in reindeer kindergarten and their main job is to be cute and delight visitors with their endearing antics. Reindeer have great names.

Another great thing about reindeer is the little sound their feet make when they run. Reindeer have what you call a „sesamoid bone“ in their feet, a bone embedded into a tendon that acts like a distancer to the bone and helps it move smoothly. In reindeer, it produces a soft clicking sound as they walk and run, which will immediately put a smile on your face when you hear it. It is a means of communication among the herd, helping other reindeer to locate their pals even in a snowstorm – or on Rudolph’s foggy day off.

But the best thing of all about reindeer is their behind when they walk or trot. The little reindeer tail happily jiggles from left to right as their clicking, snowshoe-like feet fly over the snow, and the sight of their delightful wiggly butt is a huge source of joy to anyone who has ever been lucky to enough to witness it.

No wonder Santa Claus is always depicted with a beaming smile – it must be utterly impossible to be grumpy when you spend all day on a sleigh pulled by six of these marvellous creatures, with splendid names such as Rudolph, Rubbermat or William Wigglebut, their feet clicking and fluffy tails wagging as they dash through the starlit skies with you. But don’t be surprised if, one day, Santa Claus stops by to ask you for directions (only to take wrong turn nonetheless). He’s been doing the same thing for donkey’s years, and as delightful as it may be, it’s surely no challenge for his brain any more.